


The importance of locking one's door

by msxylda



Series: Barnes's Beginnings [5]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Asexual Character, Damn it Stark and Barton, M/M, Other, Spider-Boy, Unwanted Advances, little shits, unrequited crushes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-27
Updated: 2016-09-27
Packaged: 2018-08-18 05:12:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,043
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8150261
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/msxylda/pseuds/msxylda
Summary: Barnes forgets to lock his door.
Stark and Barton will pay for his mistake





	

This would teach him… never leave his door unlocked. Not when he’d gone to do his laundry. Not when he’d gone to spar. Not when he ran to the kitchen to grab a snack. Not even if he had to piss. Just locked. All the time. In the room or out of it. All the time.

Maybe that would prevent … this … from happening in the future.

So never again would the door be left unlocked. After this one last time.

“I’m going to walk back out of this room, go down the hallway to Wanda’s room, and see if she can remove this memory from my brain.” 

“Wha—“ the little shit started, but Barnes was in no mood to listen.

“Barring that, I’m going to go to Tony and ask him to rebuild the machine H.Y.D.R.A used to wipe my mind.”

“But Sargent—“ Again the little shit tried to speak, this time shifting and dislodging some of his scant covering. Again, Barnes was in no mood. With a growl, he pulled his hoodie off over his head- one handed- and threw it at the kid.

He mewled. 

Wonderful, Barnes thought as he rolled his eyes. Stripping in front of the kid was obviously going to help his cause.

“Put that on,” he insisted, turning to give the little shit some privacy to get dressed. Give him the illusion that he was maintaining what little dignity he had left.

Barnes pinched the bridge of his nose and reflected just how he’d gotten to this point in his life. After the now infamous airport battle, the trip to Siberia, and falling out with Stark, he’d gone to Wakanda and been refrozen. Steve and Stark patched things up- meaning they started sleeping together- and the remaining Avengers had relocated to Wakanda.

Including Spider-Man and his Aunt May.

Working together, Wanda and Vision were able to remove all his triggers without corrupting his mind any more than it previously was. The god guys won. It should have been an epic moment of celebration.

Except…

Except Spider-Man (Spider-Boy, really) had been spending a lot of time with Stark as an apprentice, of sorts. Meaning he spent a lot of time around Steve while Steve was trying to convince Stark there was something in Barnes worth saving.

Meaning he somehow developed a crush on Barnes.

Barton The Bastard- deciding this was hilarious- had taken it on himself to train the kid in secret agent bullshit, meaning that Barnes now had to contend with an underage little punk with a crush who kept thinking he could sneak up on the older man and surprise him.

It hadn’t worked.

Until Barnes had left his door unlocked to go get a goddamn jeweler’s screwdriver to readjust his new arm, anyway.

When he came back, ticked that Stark wouldn’t let him do the repairs himself and insisted on doing a full scan of everything to make sure all the gears worked, it was to find Spider-Boy in his room. Naked. Splayed out on a pile of rose petals with a teeny tiny little pile obscuring his teeny tiny little spider-man. 

Come to think of it, Stark was probably in on this too. He and Barton were both dead. Laura and Steve could comfort each other. It’d be fine.

Probably.

“And if Stark doesn’t agree to help me,” since he was an asshole who would find this all hilarious, “I’m going to drink until I don’t remember it.”

“That might take a lot of drinking,” came a breathy voice far too close to Barnes’s ear. 

“I’m willing to make that sacrifice,” he said with an epic eye roll. “Can I turn around?” The little shit made some noise of confirmation. Probably something he meant to be sultry. It fell short. With another eye roll, he turned. In a complete circle. “What I should’ve said is ‘did you put the sweatshirt on yet?’”

He could hear some movement followed by the rustle of fabric. After counting to thirty, he tried again. “Listen, Spider-Boy--”

“Spider-Man. Okay, sweatshirt on.”

“It’s not that I’m not flattered… “ he started as he turned to face the Spider-Boy in question. And lost his goddamn shit. “Jesus Christ, kid,” he said as he whirled back around, “zip the fucking sweatshirt up.”

Wait, he hadn’t even thrown him a zip hoodie. Where had the kid found the zip hoodie?

“But why…” the kid whined, really helping his case.

“For starters, you’re just a kid,” Barnes pointed out. Best to get the “you’re jailbait” portion of the conversation over with.

“I’ll be seventeen in four months,” he whined again, and Dear God, Barnes suddenly felt ancient. And no longer amused.

That was it. He had to pull out the trump card. Before he said something that fractured their team more than the airport fight had. More than Siberia. “Don’t make me tell your Aunt May.”

Spider-boy leapt back as if he’d just been burned, his eyes wide with shock. To his horror, the man child’s chin started wobbling as tears formed in his too wide eyes. With a pained noise full of despair, the little menace finally left. Barreling straight into Steve Rogers.

Ironically wearing a “let’s get one thing straight, I’m not” shirt.

Steve looked at the nearly naked child in his arms, then back to Barnes. He squinted, and Barnes worried for one long moment that he was about to get a _lecture_. Instead, his deep rumble just said “Tony?”

Barnes nodded, and Steve rolled his eyes. Curling an arm protectively around the younger man, he led him away. Down the hall. Towards Steve’s room. Where the kid would be the one getting a _lecture_ on respecting people’s personal space. And probably outing Barnes as asexual, but whatever. It’d be worth it.

He wouldn’t have to worry about unwanted advances anymore from the kid. And, even better, Tony was totally going to get his punishment in the form of a _lecture_. And withheld sex. As soon as Barnes had a chance to let this incident slip to Laura, no one would be getting any in Wakanda.

Barnes smiled as he left his room in search for the more pleasant adult Barton. This time remembering to lock his door.


End file.
